Day 62

Today the dog that has been part of my life for the last 14 1/2 years passed away

I still remember when we got her and how it was my responsibilty to take her out at night and take care of her

It doesn't seem like that long ago

She was old, blind, deaf and a bit senile

She would fall down the stairs and trip over nothing

And howl if she was left home alone

Sometimes she would stand in a corner and stare into space like she forgot how to walk or forgot where she was

She really was ready to go

It's so hard to know that she was just here this morning and now she is buried in the backyard

We read the book "Dog Heaven" tonight at bedtime

Some for my son to help him understand

Some for me to make me remember that she is finally able to run

and chase squirrls and birds again

Losing anyone, even a pet is hard

It was hard as I explained it to my 3 year old

Mostly because I kept having these horrible, horrible thoughts

That I just hope I never have to explain heaven and God to my child

In reference to his daddy

I hate that the thought even came into my head

But I couldn't stop the thoughts

Now I will just pray and pray and pray that day will never ever come