Day 347

Day three hundred and forty seven Otherwise known as the LAST day THe day we are again a family The day we having been waiting and waiting and waiting for The day we know the missing piece of our family is safe and home with us THe day this is finally over THe best day ever WELCOME HOME HONEY!!!!!! WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!

Day 346

Cleaning is impossible With a 3 year old and 1 year old I am so lucky to have parents to help with the process Because I would have gotten nothing done otherwise It was a long day Of rain outside which meant we were all inside And my house did get clean Organized? No Clean? Yes The other benefit of having parents around to help Having them around to stay at the house While I go out drinking with my long lost neighbor Couple glasses of homemade wine at the dive bar down the way Helps to make a girl feel much better ANd what makes me feel even better is knowing That tomorrow I will be picking up my long lost husband

Day 345

Traveling to our own house today Just glad I didn't find mice when I came in We are getting so close Being in our own home is such a good feeling Everything doesn't feel quite real yet And I can't believe that this year deployment is almost over We will get some much needed sleep tonight Get our house cleaned tomorrow And pick up the other half of our heart the day after that!!!!

Day 344

Why do days go so slowly when you are waiting for something so wonderful? This past year has actually gone pretty fast we've been so crazy busy and been doing so much It's barely left me time to think Let alone, sleep, eat or have time to myself I can thank 2 children for that gift There were days that were hard And days that went slow But looking back the year really did fly by But now, waiting on this last week The time is CRAWLING by I wonder why thats how life works? I guess the best things in life are worth waiting for even if its a long ass time

Day 343

Play, play, play pack, pack, pack stress, stress, stress That about sums up our day we are counting days and trying to get things together and its a crazy mess right now but it will be worth it in a very short time In a maximum of 5 days time to be exact

Day 342

Well today was our first official morning without nursing My daughter's choice, not mine She was good with a substitute of dry cereal in a bowl and mickey mouse The same substitute my son had I was super happy and super sad She's been depending on me for over a year now, no bottles And so far so good Never would have thought I'd be attached to my child so much for over a year Now that its coming to an end I have mixed feelings But that's life and I'm glad she's doing it on her own and i have the patience to let her And I don't think I'll hate freedom again

Day 341

Today was the best day

Today I received a text message

and a phone call

from my husband's cell phone

and when it has been almost a year since that happened

It makes it a pretty special day

Who know a little text

and a 2 minute conversation

could mean so much?

a wife of a deployed soldier

who hasn't seen the number on her caller id for almost a year

knows how special that is

we are so close now

I'm so excited

and nervous

and stressed

and scared

and happy

and did i say excited???

7 more days (possible 6)

Day 340

Rain, rain go away

PLEASE go away until another day

Stuck inside with kids all day

While it rains all day long

Is not my idea of fun

We did actually go to church and sunday school today

but afternoons get so long when we have nothing to do

But really we have a million things to do

I'm just choosing not to think of those things

We have our usual week of school and activities

Plus packing for a trip to Duluth

Plus a shopping trip at some point

That I'm sure will be way to expensive

ANd most importantly

Getting ready for a homecoming a year in the making

The first wave of troops came home today

Which of course does not include us

We never luck out with that type of stuff

Usually he's the first to go

and the last to come home

Not sure how that works

But thats always what has happened

Either way this week will fly by

And crawl along as slow as can be

8 more days (possibly 7)

Day 339

To make up for our rainy day yesterday

we had a beautiful day today

we spent quite a bit of it outside

because in a few days it is predicted that we will get snow

we're all a little sunburned tonight

because mommy forgot that when you where less clothes and stay out playing in the sun

it is possible to get burned

Even in April

But we were all dirty and tired

and like I've said before

those are the best kind of days

we talked to our soldier this morning

who was in the best mood I've seen him in in a year

So I'm thinking he is about ready to make the trip back into the states

which means we have about a week before we see him

9 more days...POSSIBLY 8

Day 338

Rainy and cold was our day today

Just one of those type days

And of course it just rained from time to time

and who would guess that I think we happened to be outside going somewhere

During every one of those little rain showers

My children spent the day trying to drive me insane

and came close to succeeding

Luckily wine saved the day

Never fails

10 more days....

Day 337

Finally it was nice enough to leave the house for a bit

and be outside

We weren't out much

Due to some preschool time

But an hour or so felt good

And got out some good energy

and I had to cherish the moment

because tomorrow is suppose to be rain and thunderstorms

and that is not something I am looking forward too

We'll have to be creative with our time tomorrow

so mommy doesn't go stir crazy

or I'll just resort to lots of cartoons

cartoons are good too.

Plus only 11 more days!!

Day 336

Today we got exhausted to the limit

Swimming all morning apparently does that to kids

My baby spent the whole the walking all around

And I believe my son's energy left during our time in the big pool

when he spent the entire time in a panic mode of drowning

Despite the fact that he was wearing a life jacket

hanging on to me

and telling me how much fun he was having

his flailing arms and legs spoke differently

and desperate attempts to catch his breath

But I guess what ever tires them out works for me

we came home to a 3 hour nap

and a 2 hour nap

and lots of school work done

totally worth a crazy morning or swimming with 2 kids

and they still both went to bed awesome

I'd say that is an equally awesome day

12 more of them to go!

Day 335

A fairly drama free day

and it was very welcome

Just a normal, go to school

GO to ecfe type of day

And the best news of all today

Was the number 13

as in 13 days

13 days until we are welcoming home a much missed man

A husband

and father

Finally the end is way in sight

finally we can start the being a family again process

finally

335 days in waiting

and 13 more to go

Day 334

I feel like I can't even concentrate because of my psycho in laws

I'm trying my best, but I've had words with my sister in law today

And it is taking everything in me to keep my cool and act like an adult in my messages

Everything is better to the person who takes the high road

And I have to remember that

I will be the bigger person

I will be the bigger person

I will be the bigger person

If I say it enough, maybe I'll remember it :-)

Day 333

Happy Easter

And happy last holiday without my hubby

I'm still fuming about last night

ANd still on edge

But we had a great day anyway

And I got to spill my guts to my husband which helped

And I got to get angry all over again because his sister somehow got involved

ANd claims she wants nothing to do with him

Which I am not extremely sad about anyway

But I'm just going to deal with what I need to

And make sure my husband gets home safe

ANd then brace myself for the impact of craziness that will hit in his family upon that happening

Seriously...

all i know now is that my children will never be around this crap

that we will break the crazy cycle from his family

and thank GOD for that

Day 332

Wow

That's all I have to say about my in-laws

I'm not just complaining

Like normal, annoying in law drama

I'm saying I was straight up attacked by my mother in law and her husband

(not physically, verbally)

I have never seen anything like it

Especially not directed at me

If I had all night I'd write about why

But I don't have that kind of time

ALl I know is it is getting harder and harder to be the stand in for my husband

And I am so glad that I just have a few short weeks before he is home

I was shaking I was so upset and angry

And all I need now is to talk to my husband

Which I can't because he has shitty internet

So instead I'll have a glass of wine or two

And try to calm my self down

By reminding myself

That you can't fix stupid

ANd man...there would be a lot of fixing going on in that family if you could

Day 331

Today we had an all day playmate

with the granddaughter of my mom's friend

My son loved every minute

and there was no fighting so it was wonderful

I had both kids miss naps

which is not ideal for me

but I also have both kids passed out pretty early

So I guess that makes up for it

I also watched my baby grow up before my eyes this morning

She walked everywhere

She drank from a straw

and she blew her nose when asked

where is my baby going???

So proud of her

and so very sad that my baby is starting to no longer be a baby

Day 330

Today I got to meet a new baby

But most importantly I got to catch up with my oldest besets friend

And it was such a nice time

Being back at her parent's house

brought me back to the high school days

when I sat in the very same house

talking about boys, and music, and friends

Instead we were talking about babies

and jobs

and husbands

and turning 30

slightly different

but just as awesome

Day 329

TOday we played at the park ALL day

Literally all day

We woke up and got ready for the day

ANd left for the park

Ate lunch at the park

Came home for some nap time/school work time

ANd then left for the park again

My kids were zonked out for nap

And they are both out cold now

And I'm hoping they stay that way

were keeping up our new countdown to daddy being home

and the days are getting fewer and fewer

although I've already heard twice that its been pushed back a few days

so again I have to remember

I don't believe he's home, until I see his face

But I should be seeing that face REAL soon

Day 328

A last of a busy day

Preschool

ECFE class

Lunch/nap/school work

ECFE class

driving into town

and back

and into town

and back

and into town

and back

Glad it was the last of my son's classes

Glad I get my kids to all these activities

Glad summer is coming where activities are getting to be less

Day 327

THe three year old strikes again

Not sure what the phase is we are going through right now

but I hope its over soon

Leaving open gym today was accompanied by screaming and crying and dragging out

again

flashback to yesterday

he is usually so good and such a good helper

but when it was clean up time today

he threw him self on the floor screaming "NO, No cleaning up, I'm still playing!"

THen he laid down on a mat and refused to get up or help

so he was dragged to the table where he continued to cry and scream

refused to put on his coat

and then screamed to put it on as we were leaving

I love 3 year olds and their attitudes

Day 326

Oh the joys of 3 year olds

Church set me up for failure today

Instead of a casual, out at the table and chairs first service

It was in the sanctuary

It was just singing

or watching for us

and it was extra long

oh, and there was no one in the nursery to save me from horribly behaving children

it was disaster from the beginning

neither child would sit still

or be quiet

and when he left to head toward sunday school

I was suddenly met with a screaming, crying 3 year old throwing a huge fit

in church

luckily there was singing going on inside so his tantrum wasn't hear by all

He refused to go to sunday school

taking the wrong bait from my ultimatum by choosing to go home for nap instead of attend sunday school

but i had to follow through

so we left church before it ever ended

without attending sunday school

and screaming and crying the whole way

did I mention it was right at this moment that my 1 year old had an explosive diaper

all over her cute little church dress?

Just added to the whole experience

wine please

Day 325

A busy, busy day

Which is turning into a gorgeous night

WHich is nice that my son gets to help his grandpa outside all night

Because I not only get a break

But he gets some good energy out

but between the garage sales

and easter egg hunt at the mall

out to lunch

and then hour of open gym gymnastics

he probably got plenty out today

But were another day closer to the end

We are starting a new month tomorrow

And this is the month my hubby will be home

Which is completely wonderful and crazy and scary all at once

Day 324

Another average, normal day

except I started having anxiety about everything that needs to be done before hubby comes home

as i am starting to realize just how close it is actually coming

And then I know I have to worry about moving and making decisions

and basically get back to real life

And I'm not 100% sure I'm ready for real life again

We've been living everyday since he's been gone

But its kinda like living with the pause button on

If that makes any sense at all

I'm starting all over again moving away

And it was not easy last time

So I'm anticipating the same this time

Along with a little reintegration thrown into the mix

and two kids instead of one

sigh....

WHen do things just get NORMAL all the time???

Day 323

What are the chances

That the day I plan to run errands with one kid

While the other is in preschool

Is the day it's pouring rain the entire time

Good thing i didn't decide to do much with my hair

Because it would have been a big waste of time

A good day to stay home and watch lifetime

To bad my kids don't like that channel

And they would never sit still for an extended period of time anyway

Either way we survived the rainy day

And can hope for something better tomorrow

Day 322

Today we had nothing on our schedule

Literally nothing

My son told me this morning he wanted to go no where

And not get dressed

So I didn't argue and we played at home

And I'm about to go crazy

Now I remember why I stress myself out going to activities

Because otherwise I'm stuck in the house all day

Trying to keep kids entertained

All day

I do not do well with this

Time goes way slow

And kids fight way to much

And I'd probably be applying for every job possible

If I never left the house

Because staying home with crabby fighting kids

Is not my idea of fun

Thank goodness bedtime is near

And we have something on our schedule tomorrow

Day 321

Oh busy day

Preschool this morning

followed by an ECFE class for my daughter

followed by lunch

followed by nap

followed by school work

followed by play time

followed by quick dinner

followed by another ECFE class

followed by baths

followed by bedtime

finally...

Day 320

Today was better

Which says a lot

Normal start to our week

Lots of playing all morning long

leading to exhausted kids by nap time

which was nice for me

Life continues to be crazy

But its crazy in a good way

and were just continuing on

waiting for our solider to finally come home

and looking forward to the fact that we can now start a countdown

until we are a family again

Day 319

So very irritated today

And wishing I was back home in my own house

where I had a say in everything that happened

with grandparents who forget about the importance of nap time for children

a day can get very frustrating

but a constantly barking dog on top of that

And mom's about ready to go crazy

between the dog barking

and the grandparents having guests over

and the loud, loud, loud talking and laughing

and the door slamming

2 children did not get naps

one was constantly being re-woken up and bawling most of the time

The other was out trying to see what was going on as his usual social butterfly self does

and school work that was trying to get done was not

due to the frustration of one child crying

and telling the other to go back to his room

then of course they are both crabby the rest of the day

due to being over exhausted

I am just really, really ready

to be back in my own home again...

Day 318

oh birthday parties

How I loathe you sometimes

As much as I love to bring my kids to a million different things

Sometimes I wonder why I do the things I do

A swimming birthday party

With a million kids

and one adult to two kids

Who both need major supervision in the water

Doesn't equal a lot of fun for mom

between keeping track of both

and yelling at other people's kids who seem to have non-existent parents

and making sure everyone was happy

with full stomachs

and witnessed all the birthday fun there was to offer

I'm exhausted

Hope I have some tired out kids

cause I am definitely ready for bed

Day 317

I am so tired

So very tired

Between kids

And deployment

And now grad school

My time for sleep is lacking

And I think its starting to catch up with me

I have an opportunity to go out tonight

And sadly the thought of being in bed before 9pm is much more appealing

I am just so tired....

Day 316

I love taking my kids to all kinds of fun activities

But sometimes I wonder why I put myself through the torture

Although our torture us mainly at night

Closer to bedtime

When overtired gets is way to obvious

Everyone loved the circus today

But having it during lunch and nap time is not the smartest of ideas

But they did both love it

And as long as its not a daily thing

It works to have a crazy day

Although I'm counting the minutes until bedtime...

Day 315

What a beautiful

Busy

Spring day

Between swimming all morning

Playing at the park

Lunch and quiet time

Followed by another playdate until bedtime

We we're all exhausted and sleeping early

Which means it was a great day

Day 314

Same old ordinary day

With a trip to the vet mixed in

Busy as always between preschool

Playing

Ecfe class

But that's the story of our lives these days

Day 313

Just an average Monday

Extra long open gym which burned a ton of extra energy

Also discovered since I started grad school a little off schedule

I can either take 2 quarters of partime classes to be on schedule

Or have a longer break between quarters

Which works perfect since that longer break falls right at homecoming/ moving time

Talk about elevating some stress

I'd say that's a good day

Day 312

I hate teeth

Well not all teeth

Just new ones coming through baby gums

All at the same time

Why would teeth torture a child

And have 4 molars come in at once?

Or better yet why torture Mom?

My drama queen baby

Is a crabby drama queen

Which is even worse if you were wondering

Day 311

Today is st. patricks day

I forgot this morning

And my intentions to dress the kiddos in green failed

Since I wasn't going to re dress them when I remembered

In the old days I would have had a big night out to celebrate

Since its a drinking holiday that landed on a Saturday

Instead I spent the day with kids

No surprise there

And while I had an offer to go out

Staying up past nine is a struggle lately

And I went to bed instead

I know ....exciting

Day 310

I'm dragging today

From my 5 am wakeup

Until tonight getting ready for bed

We've been going strong all day

A little preschool graduation this morning

Park playing

Open gym

Lunch and naps

Or school work for me

Then more outside

I am ready for bed

Actually I was ready hours ago

But that isn't possible

I think the stress of reintegration is coming strong

And as much as I want my family back

I know how hard it is

And it scares the crap out of me

Day 309

Ahhh...

That's the sound of a night without kids

And with wine and friends

Had a much needed break tonight

Feel like I've been going a million miles an hour for a while now

Life is getting crazy

And I hope I don't follow along behind

But tonight I hopefully restored some sanity

And refreshed my self to handle the next few weeks

Day 308

Filthy and exhausted kids at the end of the day

Means nice weather stays is here!

I have a feeling we will all sleep well tonight

And I couldn't be happier about that

It is such a good feeling

To feel so exhausted from the outdoors

And I'll be even happier later

When both kids are asleep

And I'm in my clean bed

Doing nothing but waiting for sleep

Day 307

Another nice day

And busy day

Felt like I was running constantly

Barely got any school work done

Because of my husband's family drama

That is up to me to be around

Because hubby can't be there

Really can't wait for him to be home to deal with it Also saw the news today about the pentagon deciding that our troops As in my husband specifically does not deserve any time off when they come home Originally he was going to get a month or more off Now apparently being give from your family for an entire year And fighting for our country Means you go straight back to work Forget your families And your ability to adjust back at home Complete bull s%&# Apparently our country does not support our troops

Day 306

2 ecfe activities

Lunch date with the kiddos

Dog looking good after her haircut

Couple pages done on a paper

I'd say that's a good day

But today I can't get my brother out of my mind

After finding out him and his girlfriend of 4 years broke up

And he has no idea why

He said he was planning on asking her to marry him

And has to be heartbroken

I just feel so bad for him

And really can't do much of anything for him

I just know what it feels like to be heartbroken

And it might be the worst feeling in the world 

Day 305

Another beautiful day

More puddle jumping and walking

A good day at church

And besides the lack of an extra hour

From that day light savings time

It was good

I'm hoping the hour works for me this time

And I get more of a 7 am riser instead if 6 am

It would certainly make life easier My first official week if grad school is done And I am exhausted and proud And ready to tackle another

Day 304

Today was beautiful

The first day with a hint of spring

What a mood booster

A walk with the kids

Some jumping in puddles

What a great day

I am ready for summer

And our lives to begin again

Day 303

Kid filled day

School work done

Feeling the longing to be back home

So close to being done

And yet so far away

I'm getting nervous about the coming home

Excited but nervous

Just because I know how hard reintegration is

And as hard as it is to be away

Its not as hard as coming together again

Which is a weird crazy thing that is impossible to understand

Unless you've lived it

I think I'm just mentally exhausted tonight from 3 year old tantrums...

Day 302

Well school means I am busy

Really busy

And overwhelmed

I literally do not have a break in my day

Am up at 5 am everyday

And averaging 6 hours of sleep

I wonder if I can continue this for 3 years of school

Or hopefully  kids get easier to entertain

Or things settle down when were home again

Or I just suck it up for 3 years

Because in the end it will totally be worth it

Day 301

Children with no naps

Is no good

Why I had a 1 year dr appt for my daughter I'll never know

Falling right in the middle of nap time

And a 3 year old with to boot

Went fairly well despite the timing

And I really didn't pay for the lack of naps until early evening

Except for the 3 year old meltdowns leaving and going

Forgot about those

Either way its over

I even remembered to get medical records transferred for both kids

Anticipating being back hone for the next appointment

Successful day

Day 300

300 days

That's a long @ss time

300 days since our lives were normal

300 days of missing a piece of our family

300 days of growing up and getting older

300 days of being a world apart

I'm definitely ready to be done

And it's crazy how close it is getting

Almost seems like its coming to fast

As crazy as that sounds

Either way we survived 300 days

And I'm anticipating less then 65 left

65 days is a cakewalk

What is that 2 months?

Please...

I could do that in a heartbeat...

Day 298

My baby is officially not a baby anymore

I'm so happy to celebrate this milestone with her

And so sad my baby is growing up

She has become such a person

With a stubborn streak a mile long

And a dramatic personality to boot

But I love her more than I thought possible

And can't wait to see what the next year will bring And am so excited that her dad will be part of the next year of her life

Day 299

Today was my first official day if grad school

Today I am stressed to the max

I'm trying to be positive though

Remembering college

I believe the first day was always overwhelming

I think once I figure this online stuff out

It will be slightly less stressful

But I hope the hubby is ready for some extra responsibility

Because I am definitely going to need lots more help then he's used to

Until then grandma is taking the load

And hopefully in the end this will all be worth it

Day 297

Another busy day

I feel like I have a million things I needed to accomplish today

And between an ecfe event

And visiting my husband's family

I got none of it done

I have a feeling I'll be up way to late tonight

And I'm not super happy about that

But I have a one year olds birthday to get ready for

And that's more important then anything!

Day 296

Exhausted

That's me and my kids

Had a full day of shopping

Mostly for a computer for my school

But a quick trip with two kids

Turns into an all day adventure

Exhausting adventure

I was lucky my mom came with us to help out

And I had the great luxury of taking a bathroom break by myself

I seriously thought that was the best part of having help

But after a day of scattered naps

And getting to bed late

I plan on sleeping well

Day 295

Today was the first official stay home sick from school day

We all got up and dressed and started eating breakfast

But my little guy wasn't quite right

And temperature check confirmed 100.2 degrees

He was a trooper though and was insisting on going to school

However he also didn't argue when I changed him into sweats

And settled him on the couch with his blankets and cartoons

Really who would argue with that

So he got a day off

Lots of rest

A long nap

And endless cartoons

I'd call that a good day

And us girls just hung out doing our girl things

Day 294

Well the big blizzard warning

Everything cancelled

And we got maybe 1/2 inch of snow

Needless to say we were not home bound today

Which was good But oddly disappointing I guess I just haven't seen a good snowstorm in a while And was weirdly looking forward to it Our house got about a foot of snow So if we'd been home we would have gotten it But if I was home it means I would have been in charge of getting rid of the snow So in that case I probably would have been wishing for the opposite Guess you always want what you can't have

Day 293

I don't know who replaced my sweet little baby girl

With a screaming

Crying

Hitting

Tantrum throwing girl

But I wish they'd bring my sweet baby back

Because this child is NO fun

If this is any indication of her teenage years

I am in TROUBLE

Seriously

Bedtime please come soon

Wine come even sooner....

Day 292

I officially hate car seats

All day yesterday cleaning

Trying to switch to a bigger carseat

Failing at that

Failing at getting car seats back in car

Frozen fingers because its WINTER

I hate car seats

This is the hubby's job

And boy was I missing him today

Day 291

Holy snow

Snow snow is finally here

Probably a good 5 inches

We made it to church

Even though we probably shouldn't have been on the roads

But it was cut short because of the weather

I also started my orientation for school today

And now I've had a taste if school again

Am even more scared and excited then before

Good thing I got my planner

Now if I could just find time to organize it

So I can be organized

Day 290

Had a more take it easy day

My baby was running a fever most of the day

Which lucky for me does not effect her levels of crabbiness to much

Also gave me a a rare chance to run errands with my oldest

Something we don't get to do enough

And despite a few non listening incidents

It was a good time for us

And good grandma sleeping time for my daughter

We ended the night early

And I was so excited to get to sleep early

However a pooping event with the baby delayed it

And that damn lifetime movie....

Day 289

Today I decided I need to spend some good money on a planner

I'm starting to feel a little overwhelmed with life

I've been doing ok so far

But not being at my own house

And so many kid activities

And doing it on my own leaves very little room for error

And now that I'm throwing grad school in the mix

I think I might need some help

And knowing we'll be moving back soon

And having a homecoming

On top of everything else

I'm just asking to forget something

Most likely the most important thing

Like a mortgage payment

Yep...I think we'll go planner shopping tomorrow

Day 288

After last night if staying out way to late with family

And not having kids to bed until 11pm

(Terrible I know)

And getting up early for school once again

We are all ready for early bed tonight

I think I am more than any one else

I've had crabby snotty nosed kids today

And I am ready to have no snot wiped on me

No kids whining and crying at my feet

And just silence

And maybe a dvr...

Day 287

It is official

I am a student again

I am on school again

Not just any school

GRADUATE school

I am so proud of myself

Excited

Happy

And scared out of my mind

I now have to figure out how to be

A wife

Mother

Homemaker

And student

Military spouse

But 5 years from now I will have NO regrets

And I am very proud

And did I mention scared out of my mind!?!

Day 286

Well snow got in my way

I got up early

Did my workout

Would have been ready to go for a day if shopping

To bad the roads were covered in snow

And it continued to snow through most of the day

And hearing about a car accident near us that killed 4 people

Definitely swayed me to NOT to drive anywhere

Besides Walmart

And the mall

Wasn't my day if shopping I planned

But it got us out if the house

And got some errands ran

And after nap my son and i enjoyed the snow as much as we could

With some sledding

And snow angels

And deep snow walking

And snow castle building

So the day still turned out as a good day

And isn't that all that matters?

Day 285

Today was the first day in longer than I can remember that we went no where

We played at the house all day

Partly because of the president day holiday

Partly because of the afternoon snowstorm

Wasn't as long of a day as I thought it might be

The world didn't come crashing down because I wasn't busy for every second of the day

It was actually kind of nice

Of course I am already planning my extra busy day for tomorrow

And as long as snow doesn't get in my way it should be a long busy day

Old habits die hard I guess

Day 284

Church and Sunday school

I was in my own with 2 kids in church today

Was a little worried

But no need!

Kids were great

And my baby even stayed in the nursery for the last half

I had a blissful half hour of worship to myself

I probably listened to and enjoyed the sermon for the first time on years

A great day

Even if it meant my baby was growing up...

Day 283

My frustration levels have been at an all time high today

Which means my patience has been low

Which means its been a long day

I'm tired

Of pretty much everything if you were to ask me at this very minute

And as much as I avoid free time

Because free time gives me time to think

I'm looking toward to our long weekend of nothing to do

Of course when those days come around

I might be singing a different tune

Day 282

Had a mental breakdown

Just everything that I stay so busy so I don't have to think about it

Hit me head on

Starting with an early morning

And having to get off the treadmill so my dad could get on on

Which was annoying and apparently all I needed to be set off A reminder That I'm not in my house Not using my things I have to work around other people Not myself That if I have a free moment from kids Thar means nothing if it doesn't work around at least 2 other people Because once again I am a guest here right now I think if my son wasn't in school I might have started packing my things That is how frustrated I am at not having my own space Or with presidents day weekend we could have left for the weekend But there is no water turned on there And I'd have to get food And who knows what creatures I'd have to clean out So I got over it Just like everything else And started my countdown to hubby finally coming home again

Day 281

Had some preschool today

And a late night ecfe event

By late night I mean 4:30

It was a nice evening energy burner though

And made our evening fly by

I love our busy days and passing the time

But had a wake up call that we might be a little to busy

When I remembered an anniversary party we we're suppose to go to

For my husbands aunt and uncle

That took place LAST Saturday

Never even crossed my mind

Which is NOT like me

Usually I am the ocd one keeping track of everything

I feel horrible

And think that maybe I might be taking on a little to much...

Day 280

School and library

Exciting day for us

Finally got some snow today too

That's something we haven't seen most of the winter

I keep thinking this would have been a great winter to be at the house alone

Since I would have barely had to clear out the driveway at all

My son loved helping his papa shovel

And my baby loved watching them

Now we just have to hope the snow gets cleared out for our morning drive to preschool

When we start another busy day early morning

Day 279

Today is valentines day

I've never been big on this day

Kinda always thought it was a slightly dumb day

Liking the day after better because that's when all the good candy is half price

But despite all that I'm still a little sad

Or I should say a little more sad

That my love isn't here on this day

To hear my complaints about how much I really don't like this day

Because despite my feelings

I still celebrate with the kiddos

And its another reminder that he is missing a first for our daughter

And the fun and excitement my son is having

Day 278

And we begin again

Another week

Another busy schedule

Another week closer

Today we did our usual

Along with making some valentine chex mix to send the hubby

And getting valentines ready for a preschool party tomorrow

Nothing to exciting

Nothing to boring

Day 277

My 3 year old is getting sneaky

Or really missing his daddy

Hard to say really

After getting pulled out if the bath early

For not listening and hurting his sister

He stopped bawling to say

"I miss my daddy"

"I can't do it because daddy is gone "

Of course I immediately stop being mad

And start feeling bad for him

Then he followed up with

"I need daddy here to put in my underwear"

Hmmmm....

Now I'm feeling more suspicious rather then bad for him

Guess I'll give him the benefit of the doubt

He is 3 after all

That behavior can't be starting yet

Right?!?

Day 276

What an exhausting day

Started with some library storytime

Then went to the indoor playground

With friends

And played

And played

And played

I think my son ran for about 4 hours straight

He was exhausted Literally came home and passed out on the couch I on the other hand was ready to drink heavily while there It was pure craziness With way to many kids running around And to few parents I couldn't even count how many times I yelled at other people's kids today But I guess all that matters is my kid had a wonderful day

Day 275

Today I read a blog post from a supposed "real army wife"

According to this woman national guard soldiers are not actually soldiers

Wives of national guard soldiers are not army wives

NG do not know how to act

How to behave

How to respect the uniform

Basically according to this idiot

If you are NG you are not a soldier

Her differences were that her husband is deployed more than once

(My husband is currently on his 3rd tour)

When they come home from deployment her husband still wears his uniform to work

(My husband also wears his uniform to work)

And for those reasons NG are not soldiers???

My blood is boiling in response to her blog

She sounds so horrible and ignorant that I'm almost embarrassed for her

If I didn't want to punch her along the side of her head

People like her are a disgrace to our military

And as much as she wants to say she is a supportive military wive

She might be the furthest thing from anything that should be representing our soldiers

ALL of our soldiers...including national guard

Day 274

Ever had that moment where you question yourself

Where you are not sure you are right or wrong

I had that moment this morning

I'm so big on routine

And knowing what happens next

I might complain about it sometimes

But the truth is it really is how we survive

So when I walked into preschool this morning

And things were different

I went into slight panic mode

Is it really Thursday?

Am I off a day?

Am I at the wrong preschool?

Did I mess up somewhere?

Is it the wrong time?

Am I early?

Late?

Is this the wrong class?

Turns out there were just a couple differences

Like small differences

As in a parent I've never seen

And a closed door

Seriously

That was it

I feel a little foolish now thinking back

Maybe I need to let up on my routine slightly

Very slight

Don't want to do anything crazy now

Day 273

Sometimes it feels like my life is ground hog day

Every day is just a repeat if the one before it

I call this survival mode

Until we reach an ending

And then a new survival mode comes

They call that reintegration

Probably the hardest one

But no one would understand that

Unless they are living it

Day 272

Today we celebrated Grandma's 60th birthday

It was so fun to see my 3 year old excited about it

And happy to give her a card from him

And sing happy birthday

Mostly we had a typical day

With a few extras thrown in

Its hard to believe its less then a month from my baby's 1st birthday

I feel like we are just getting closer and closer to the end of this crazy year

And on to the next crazy year

Of learning to be a family again

Looking back now its hard to  believe how many months have gone by

It goes fast looking at the big picture

And slower then anything everyday

Day 271

Oh Monday funday

Or Monday

Just like every other Monday

Open gym

Playing at the slide

Some yelling at kids that weren't mine

I never know the correct protocol for those situations

When the parents of children are sitting right there

And doing or saying nothing when their children are misbehaving

But when two of their boys are holding on to my child and not letting go

I'm obviously going to yell at them

And when I hear the same group of children plotting how to "get him"

Him being my 3 year old

Who is smaller then all of them

Again...I'm going to yell at them

And I won't feel bad about it

I guess if someone wants to yell at ne for that they are welcome to

I guess the correct protocol is standing up for my child no matter what

And I really don't think about it until later on

And those parents never said anything to me anyway

Maybe I was just doing the dirty work for everyone

Day 270

Exciting news today

We've finally booked our honeymoon

7 years and two kids later

We will finally take our vacation together

Ocean

Beach

Pools

Drinks

Sleeping when we want

Waking up when we want

Eating when we want

Taking naps when we want

Working out when we want

Doing nothing all day long

Paradise

Just me and my love

Day 269

Had a disappointing night tonight

Planned on going out for a while after kids were in bed

Never happened

Missed the party bus that was going out

Because I had to put kids to bed first

And would have had to drive out of town

Basically it just never happened

And I was disappointed

And annoyed

And sad

That I sat at home alone instead

Again

Day 268

Had a kid/grown up playdate today

I love those kind of playdates

Kids play on their own

Grown up talk is enjoyed

Wine may or may not have been involved

Makes such a difference in a day

Kids are exhausted and happu

Mommy is happy

Makes for a good day

Day 267

School day

Like most days right now

Errand running with a crabby, tired 3 year old was not the finest moment of my day

And ending with tropical night at ECFE

Hopefully we can all get some good sleep tonight after our busy day

Small hint to my non sleeping through the night 11 month old!

Day 266

Nothing to exciting again

I wish I had more things to write about

To make it more exciting to look back on this time

But the truth is we have a routine

A very specific routine

And that same thing week after week

Is what gets us through each week

It makes the days fly by

And the minutes tick on

So that the time until we are whole again

Doesn't seem so far away

And we aren't sitting around

Wasting a year

Watching a clock

We're living

And surviving

While we watch the clock tick by

Day 265

265 days behind us

I'd like to start my 100 days left countdown today

Because 100 days seems like nothing

But my faith in the military is little to none

Therefore trusting that there is only 100 days left

Is not an ability I have

It's a wait and see game

But the military usually wins

So we'll see what kind of post I have in 100 days .....

Day 264

Night out with the girls

So needed

So refreshing

Feeling like a good mom again

Amazing what a couple hours away from kids

Can do to make you want to be with your kids again

And we started our busy week again

Hope it goes smooth and quickly

Day 263

I had a deployment jealousy moment last night

Seeing a photo of couple friends on facebook

Hanging out together, drinking and playing games

And realizing that I am not part of that crowd right now

I am thousands of miles from my husband

And any future couple nights

Are still months away

Just a moment of missing my life

And my husband

On a lighter side of the say

My 3 year old told me today

That my almost 11 month old daughter

Likes guys in trucks

Hmmmm...

Hurry home daddy

Keep those trucks away!

Day 262

Oh am I in need of a break

Either my patience has worn through

Or I'm getting sick with something

I hope its the latter

That is much easier to fix

I've felt like I was dragging all day

Didn't have the energy I needed to deal with 2 kids

And had zero patience

Hoping a good nights sleep

Makes everything better

Restores my energy

And brings back my patience

Day 261

The week is over

We made it through out crazy schedule

I have to say I'm exhausted

Hope I can keep it up for 2 months

Between running places

And cleaning and laundry

I haven't had a spare minute today

Which is of the course the day hubby is trying to get hold of me

And made me want to jump through the computer

When he asked what I was doing all day anyway

Just remind myself again he's fighting for our country right now

And doesn't quite get the reality of real life at the moment

Day 260

Today was our slightly less busy day

Only preschool this morning

And a doctor appt for my eyes

With a baby

Which made it slightly more difficult

But manageable

I just feel lucky if I have one kid instead if two at this point

Apparently I am allergic to something

And it's up to me to find out what

Like a really horribly difficult game of "where's Waldo? "

Tomorrow is more preschool and a trip through m-dot to see the big trucks

And the start if my "where's Waldo?" Search of allergies

Day 259

Day 2 of busy schedule

Day 1 of new preschool

He loved it

I'm exhausted

What was I thinking adding more to our schedule??

Good part is days should fly by this way

And before we know it spring will be here

And our family will be whole

Day 258

Busy two month schedule day 1

Went off without a hitch

Although by the end of the day

With two kids who thought they didn't need naps

Was a little rough

My quiet boxes are working wonderful

And ny 3 year old has been going to bed great

But without a nap

He can't stay up long enough to talk to his daddy

Still haven't figured out the solution

During our nap/no nap transition phase

I feel bad he doesn't get to talk to his dad

And visa versa

But not bad enough to struggle with a not wanted nap

And a bedtime time that is way to late because of nap

Tough call

Hopefully I'll figure it out someday soon

Day 257

Started out our busy week

Besides the usual schedule

We added in another preschool

And a couple other one time events

I'm probably crazy but oh well

I'm also finishing up grad school application

If I don't need anything else to do

I really am probably crazy

If I ever hear someone say a stay at home mom does nothing

I would probably punch them in the neck

But I guess this is how I make it through my days

Until life can be normal again

Day 256

Had our usual Sunday today

To quote my 3 year old at breakfast

"I'm going to church and Sunday school and to play with my friend Jenny"

Jenny being the nursery attendant

3 1/2 hours later we left church

Happy to accomplish all three

Day 255

Today was birthday party craziness

In a good stressful way

The mikes hard lemonade helped a little to make it through the day

It was a water park

With lots if children

And lots if noise

And lots if craziness

But the children loved it

And exhausted themselves to the core

Both fell fast asleep on the way home

Fought me tooth and nail for bedtime

And then passed out cold

For the entire night

What a crazy wonderful day

Day 254

Today I made major steps towards starting a masters degree program

I'm so scared and nervous

And also very excited

Its something I've always wanted to do

And now actually might get the chance to

I also got an hour and a half kidless

To have a drink with an old co worker

Which could explain why I'm feeling good and relaxed

Not from a drink

Although I'm sure that helped

But from some time without kids

To be an adult

And catch up with an old friend

Sometimes its the smallest little things

That make the biggest difference

Day 253

Today has flown by

In a good busy kind of way

Started with preschool

Ended with legos at the library

And only a few screaming crying tantrums

Biggest downfall to our day was a -20 temp

As in 20 BELOW zero

When we're spoiled by 30 degree temps in january in Minnesota

This is a pretty significant change

But we survived with no frostbite in sight

And will wait for our 30 degrees above to come back

Day 252

Well I bragged about my quiet boxes today

He chose nap instead of playing

No fights no arguments

Just easy

And then came backfire

After bath came the idea to play with his quiet toys

He was told no

And now we're going on about an hour of tantrum

I should never brag...

Day 251

Busy busy busy

Up early for school

Enjoyed an afternoon of no naps

My 3 year old and I started an ecfe class together

To give us some alone bonding time

And give my daughter some without mom time

My kids who thought they knew better during naptime

My 3 year old fell asleep on the way to class

And my 10 month old fell asleep before I got home

We did have a successful first day of quiet boxes though

Now I can just hope tomorrow brings the naps I so missed today

Day 250

Today we spent the day doing a project

Kind of for the kids

Mostly for me to maintain my sanity

And continue to get an hour or two to myself every day

With the lovely invention of pinterest

I found the fantastic idea of rest time boxes

A different box for each day if the week

Of quiet toys

To only be played with at naptime

Now my 3 year old can either nap

Or play quietly in his room

And I still get some free time to get things done

Or watch my dvr shows

Between running to several stores

Going through the toys we have

And putting them together

It took most of our day

Hoping it will be worth it

Tomorrow will be our trial day

Can't wait to see!

Day 249

Busy morning

Of church, Sunday school and play

That's the way I like it

Because the morning flew by

Kids were exhausted

And they both took awesome naps

That equals a successful day

Now if I could only get the crying whining 3 year old off the floor

And brush his teeth

And go to bed

I believe the biggest challenge is still ahead ....

Day 248

A normal average day

Nothing to exciting

Nothing to bad

I almost slept an entire night

That hasn't happened in over a year

That would be a major milestone I believe

I realized I forgot a major credit card payment

Literally never crossed my mind

I wonder if they give a free pass if your a spouse of a soldier

Worth a shot I guess

I guess I have more going on then I realized

Who would have thought?

Day 247

Had a usual busy morning of kids activities

I feel like I'm starting to repeat myself describing everyday life

Some type of kids activity

Some type of kid tantrum

Get them to bed successful

And call it a good day

Truth is I like it that way

That's how days go by fast

And go by without me missing what my life should be right now

And missing my husband

At least not as much

I miss everything

But the same thing day after day

Does make it easier some how

Day 246

Well I have a 3 year old camping out with me tonight

Literally

I have his little table top tent in the corner of my room

Visitors mean I lose a room

And since my baby is having such a hard time understanding the concept of sleeping all night

It seems easier to have the 3 year old bunk with me

We've also started the night out wrong

Since the baby that has usually been asleep for an hour

Is currently wide awake

And the 3 year old seems ready to pull an all nighter

Seems like a good night for a glass of wine

Or several

Day 245

It all started at 12:30am

I should have known when it began that early into the day

That it was going to be one of THOSE days

Having just fallen asleep 30 minutes earlier

I love to be woken to the frantic words

"I gotta go potty"

But when they are closely followed by

"Ah no...mommy"

That's never good

Peeing right NEXT to the toilet works too I guess

Then 5 am wake up from my other child

After that previous child wakes up soaked in his bed

Showers

Laundry

Bed making

Trying to get out if the house for my own appointment

So obviously the baby chose not to take a nap so I could get ready

Instead crawled around

Crying when I got to far away

The proceeded to poop up her entire back

Finally figured out how to clean that

Only to have her pee all over herself and anything near her

More showers

Still need to get ready

I believe the time was around 10:30am by this time

I've had more fun during my first few hours of the day

I survived

And currently we are all pretty clean

Success

Day 244

Well another 50 degree

January day

In Minnesota

How strange it is to go out walking

In the middle of january

As a Minnesota native I have to say I don't think I've ever seen weather this nice

At least not this time of year

Now I don't feel bad about my neighbors plowing snow for us

Since there is barely any snow at all

I can't say I hate this kind of winter

But I have this terrible feeling

That us minnesotans will pay for it eventually!

Day 243

Oh busy day

Open gym

Store

Lunch

Nap

Birthday party swimming

Birthday party

Home for bed

I'm exhausted

So are my kids

I couldn't do this day everyday

But I'm glad I did

Cause my kids had a blast

I watched my son so proud of himself for going down a waterside by himself

Caught up with some family

And when I finally rolled into bed

I was happy about the wonderful day my kids had

Day 242

Today has flown by

I love those days

And minus a haircutting experience with a 3 year old

And a 10 month old screaming in the background

That involved all 3 of us covered in hair

I've been calm and collect all day

I'm also surprisingly awake considering how little my baby slept last night

Now we're getting ready for bed

And making plans for tomorrow

And ready to start a new week

Day 241

I'm feeling like I want to go home tonight

Not my parents where we are staying during the deployment

But home home

Ever get the feeling that you are wearing out your welcome?

I just have this gut feeling we are

I'm just getting a little tired of living out of a basement

And not feeling like I'm 100% settled

Mostly I'm just sick of this deployment

I miss my husband

I miss my home

I miss my dog (never thought I'd say that!)

I'd count how many days are left but I'd probably get more depressed thinking about it

These days are not easy days

Day 240

Today we played and played and played

My son was so excited to have his playdate today

It was actually very nice

They were both very well behaved kids

And played good together

Topped off with a trip to mcdonalds for lunch

And getting to skip nap

You can't beat today in the eyes of a 3 year old

Skipping nap was not the highlight of my day however

I really love nap time

But I can't complain I also had two kids that slept in today And I slept almost an hour and half past my usual 6am wake up That was the highlight of my day

Day 239

Today we went on a nice walk

Which isn't so strange in its self

But considering its January 5th

In Minnesota

Its a first for us all

Was 50 degrees today

I would have been less surprised by a 50 below zero day

Seriously

The walk did us all good

My 3 year old hasn't been this well behaved in longer then I can remember

Wish it really were the ending of winter

But I've lived here long enough to know that this is not winter

And I have a bad feeling we still have some ahead of us

But I sure enjoyed my day today

Remind me of that when the negative weather comes....

Day 238

Today involved a trip to the library

My 3 year old has been begging to go

Besides the fact that I love that my 3 year old loves the library

Its also a great winter day nothing else to do activity

To bad we left kicking and screaming Just one of those days it turns out Guess we'll try again tomorrow

Day 237

Back to school today

I love school

Mostly I love 2 1/2 hours of one child

That doesn't talk back

I love a non talking child at times

I also enjoy a talking child

As my 3 year old said he had three more things to tell his daddy before getting off skype

They were as follows

"Happy new year daddy! "

"I see a light thing up there"

And

"Buildings are dark so you turn on the lights through the window "

Important stuff those three year olds have going on

Day 236

Tomorrow our schedule begins again!

Thank goodness

Routine and order will come again

I never thought I would be so excited about that

We did lots of playing today

And my kids went to bed surprising well

I'm still waiting for the baby to wake up though

I'm not quite trusting she's good and down

I have to say I thanked them both this morning though

From a mom who hasn't slept past 6am in longer then I can remember

Waking up at 7:23am was the best unexpected present ever!

Day 235

First day of 2012

Finally in the year my husband will be home

Still 5 months away

But closer...getting closer

Nothing to special about the day

Ordinary waiting on deployment type day

Tomorrow starts the beginning of the end of the holidays

And I truly could not be happier

I have the post-holiday-long-deployment-missing-my-husband-and-normal-life blues

On to normal schedules again!!!

I also believe I have slight ocd tendencies

And really feel much better with my normal scheduled life...